When we choose to get married, we actively participate in a relationship with our loved ones. But, unfortunately, relationships change, and things you may not have noticed while dating, after getting engaged, and eventually married, can start to surface.
If your husband was experimenting with drugs before getting married, he may have promised he would stop after you were married. Sadly, if he is struggling with substance abuse, chances are he is still using drugs and hiding it, so you do not find out. Even if you know he is still using, substance abuse and addiction are destructive behaviors that often overflow into your marriage.
You may have assumed his drinking and drug use behaviors were normal, especially if you were also drinking and experimenting with drugs. However, while you could have outgrown your partying ways, your husband may not have. In addition, addiction could begin to develop after you have been married. The stresses of life, such as finding and keeping a job, making ends meet financially, starting a family, buying a house, etc., can become overwhelming. Your husband could have turned to drugs as a way to cope with the added stress that led to his addiction.
There are even situations where your husband’s addiction has been there all along. He could have hidden it from you all along while he was still able to make an effort to hide it. But, eventually, as his addiction grew, he no longer cared about hiding it because all that mattered was his drug of choice.
Living with a Drug Addicted Husband: What Should I Do?
If you are living with a drug addicted husband, then you know that it can be hard to be in a relationship with an addict. You may dislike the person they have become and not know what to do to help them. It is easy to get dragged down with them when you do not know what you should or should not be doing.
Some spouses can also become addicted like their husbands when they give into pressure to participate in drug use with them. So, before you can help your husband, you need to help yourself, as follows:
Do get help if you are struggling with addiction yourself.
You cannot help your husband if you do not address your own substance abuse problems first.
Do not downplay his addiction.
It is easy to start denying he has a substance abuse problem. You could make excuses to friends and family. You might call his work to say he will be late or out sick. You may just pretend everything is perfect with your marriage. However, these behaviors further enable your husband’s addiction.
Do not support his addiction.
If you give him money or even purchase drugs for him, you are supporting his addiction. You do need to protect yourself financially. So, if you have joint accounts, it is often in your best interest to open individual accounts. Move money where you have access to avoid being surprised your savings is gone because he used it to support his drug habit.
Do learn more about addiction.
Taking the time to learn more about substance abuse can put you in a better place to provide support. There are all sorts of resources you can utilize, such as:
- Support groups for loved ones of an addict
- Addiction specialists
- Peer support specialists
Do focus on yourself.
You need to do what is best for you. It can be challenging to focus on your own goals and objectives when your husband is addicted to drugs. However, taking time to ensure your life and routine remains normal puts your husband on notice that you are not going to become codependent and enable his addiction.
Do let your husband face the consequences of his addiction.
When your husband is forced to face the consequences of abusing drugs, it can be the moment he realizes he needs help. If that means he has to get arrested, face drug charges, lose his job, or anything else that arises from his addiction, you need to step back and let it happen.
Do not be afraid to leave.
If your husband refuses to get help and continues on the path he is on, it could be time for you to leave. It is not uncommon with addiction for those addicted to become angry, aggressive, and abusive when questioned about their drug abuse or put into a situation where you no longer are enabling them.
Do consider staging an intervention.
Living with a drug addicted husband can become nearly impossible. Therefore, it could be beneficial to stage an intervention with help from an intervention specialist. The purpose is to put your husband on notice about their addiction, whether they choose to seek help or not.
Drug Rehab for Your Drug Addicted Husband in Dallas
If your husband admits he needs help and is ready to take the steps to address his drug abuse, Casa Colina in Dallas can provide the assistance he needs. We offer customized drug rehab programs for men.
We also offer family programs for you to help you better understand your husband’s addiction and how you can best support him. For further information about our drug rehab for men or family programs, please feel free to contact us at 844-974-2272 today.